Recovery from a procedure

When I went to kaiser last Thursday the doctor said it was too soon to put a perm tube in me. They took the area on my lower right side, sorta by your hip bone and inward . There they shot me 4 or 5 time with Novocaine to numb me. Then they pushed a needle type tube in me. All Icould say was "pressure pressure pressure" This was no walk in the park. attached to this needle was a small pump. I was able to watch what came out-UGH!
Think about the size of a giant coke bottle-well I filled 2 1/2 of those=2 1/2 liters. was a brown amber color. The doc says it is fluid that is being created by the cancer tumors.
He wants to see how long it will take me to fill up again-OH whoopee!

I have been weak and have stayed in bed most of the time. Much pain..
my helper is here to day and I hope that I can get back on track and get stronger.
Love, Suzanne, a cancer survivor

UGH ! ! !

For the last 2 weeks I have felt pressure building in the area below my navel. I didn't think too much of it. I kept an eye on it...however these last few days I had to face it. I was looking as if I was pregnant and was having some pains and lots of pressure.
Today I saw my internist and had a sonogram. Results show I have "ascites" and the small cyst or tumor on my pelvis is 3x's what it was in late December.
I am waiting for a call from Kaiser Walnut Creek surgery. I will have surgery in the next 2 days. Sounds like in/out surgery. They will insert a catheter type tube in my stomach. They will then teach me how to drain the fluids off.
The fluids are created by the cancer tumors.
This is not the news I wanted. yet I must deal with it.

I have also hired a friend to be my caregiver each day from 11 to 4 M-F I knew I was not keeping up with my supplements and I needed more juicing . This will allow her to support me to stay steady to my alternative process.
Of course at this moment I am off EVERYTHING until I get this tube in me.
I wish I was making steps forward and feel sad. I AM NOT giving up-I am still a fighter.
Love, Suzanne, a cancer survivor
'

month of transitions...a test of faith and emotional strength.

Hi friends, much has happened this last month:
* 8 year relationship breakup
* Moved to Joe and Deb's
* Started alternative health program
* All personal belongings out of condo
* Condo sold

"The birds in the sky would be sad and lonely if they knew I lost my one and only."

The parting of ways with Carl/Barry has been painful. He was my rock and I love him. We had ups and downs over 8 years-mostly UP times! We had fun, we laughed, we traveled and we share colorful rich memories. I grieve for the relationship. Yet, I know my life was drastically changing and Carl/Barry's was flourshing. We were going in 2 different directions. I couldn't get well enough, fast enough to keep up. I still love him, you don't stop loving overnite. I will always hold a special place in my heart for him.

The move...
Day by day I brought over a few things to Joe and Deb's. Slowly setting up the room to be "my room". Moving into one room only allows for the essentials. It has become pretty black and white what goes to the new home and what goes to Salvation Army. Soon my room will be set up. I still have boxes of stuff piled high. In time it will get sorted thru and I will find a place for it.
It is a peaceful room - I am clear I am here to heal.
Joe and Deb have been wonderful with "open arms". Willing to do "whatever it takes" for me to follow thru on my alternative healing methods.

Alternative health program
I am under the care of Dr Lee a naturalpathic doctor(she). I also still have the support of Kaiser doctors. I am following what is called "The Kelly Method" It was created many years ago and has helped thousands of people. The medical community does not talk about it and it is kept off the radar screen. Doctors know medical stuff, they dont really have the time to research other ways of curing/healing. Beside's I read its against the law for a doctor to heal someone without using phamacutical drugs ( I know, hard to believe).
This program is challenging to say the least-OK-it is really hard to do. However it is better than chemo. So each day I take it step by step.

I would say being on chemo made me a victim-I had no control. The chemo took over, made me sick-really sick. Until the chemo got out of my body, I was at the mercy of the effects.
While "The Kelly Method" is a full contact sport. I am in control. I am choosing each day to follow these rigerous rules.
Here is a sample of my daily schedule:
*8am urine test
physical therapy exercise for hip and leg
turn on infared sauna
take 30 supplements
*9am 45 min sauna-15 min shower
*10-11:30am coffee enemas (from this point on know as COFFE DELIGHTS)
*11:30am breakfast-14 raw grain ceral plus blueberries (yep, tastes like glue!)
26 supplements
*12-1:30pm FREE TIME-14 supplements
*1:30-2:30pm 16oz of fresh greens thru the juicer with 3 tablespoons RAW LIVER (you
read it correctly)
20 supplements
*3-4pm FREE TIME
*4-5:30 coffee delights
*5:30pm 14 supplements
*6:30pm prepare dinner, choice of special orderd salmon or grass fed beef ( yeah!)
and tons of vegtables
25 supplements
*7:30pm FREE TIME
*9pm 45 min sauna-15 min shower
10 supplements
*10pm Make coffee for next day coffee delights, grind 14 raw grain ceral and mix
with water for next day breakfast
7 supplements

It is mind boggling to keep up with it all. I am still in the process of getting organized. I will be bagging my supplements so it will be easy to grab. A bag in the morning, a bag before breakfast, a bag for breakfast etc.
If I have questions along the way, Dr Lee is available.
Each day, step by step-its not easy! Good thing I am strong and want to fight for my life.

Clearing out the condo
2 weeks ago I met with Karen T and Cathy Z fron Coldwall Banker. They had high hopes that my condo would sell. They felt the market was changing. This was on a tuesday night and the next sat there was a crew of people working at my condo. We needed to get everything out, except staging pieces. Rugs up and out, small pieces of furnature, decorating accessories collected along the way. We had to do it, the house would go on the market in just a few days.
It was very stressful, emotional and exhausting. Friends say, "do you want this? do you want that?". Having to make snap decisions...seeing thousannds of dollars spent over the years on beautiful clothes...watch them go out the door to goodwill. I have no need for them now, I am in a healing mode-I have a NEW story.
Joe took a full truck load of stuff to the dumps and a full truck load to Salvation Army.
It was the end of the day and Salvation Army was going to refuse-we cant take any more today. The manager took a walk around the truck and said OK-last load today-NO MORE! ( he saw there was some good stuff)
As Joe drove away he looked in his rear view mirror and saw 2 workers opening bags, talking excitedly and both piled 2 hats on their heads. They had big smiles.
That made my day.

Condo sold
Only 3 days on the market. The buyer needs in NOW, he is staying at a local hotel. No problem deal done . Sat we pulled out all the staging furnature. Some to Salvation Army and some had been sold. It will most likely close on thursday . Finally that chapter is closed.

Change is hard. In my head I know I am doing the right thing-following the right path. I had to let go of my attachment to "things" - "stuff"-"money". While I had the choice to choose what to keep, many people dont have that option. Think about what it is like to have your house burn down, or a tornado tear your house apart. All of your "family pictures" and of your"stuff" GONE.

I am grateful for all of my family and friends. While I may be the front runner with the torch fighting for my life...I have many around me, staying right there with me.
Love, Suzanne , a cancer survivor; transformed by the challenge